Eh... something

OK so this week I will probably go to the beach with Anna! Horray! um... then... next monday I have a doctors appointment for the dry skin on my arms because I've had it since winter and I really don't know why... then tuesday I have an appointment for the orthodontist cuz I still have two baby teeth but there are teeth growing in underneath them. Then that weekend Steve might come to the beach with me but I'm not sure if he can get off yet. At some point I want to go to NYC with Sarah but she's busy all this week. Idk what else will happen then but that's the plan I have set up for the next few weeks. After that I go back to school and start my intensive language courses of Latin. I'm pretty scared but I think it'll be good if I have the weekends free. Then I can see Steve a lot and that would be lotsa fun. I found my sketch book and I might start that up again but idk...

I got a 12o GB external hard drive the other day and that's working out pretty well. Ok well not completely... now my iTunes is empty. I'm sure it's easy enough to fix though. Eh well it will take some time but I can do that tomorrow since I don't have anything else planned. I kinda figured that it would get messed up at least a lil bit. Well um... oh yea so I want to get a mac laptop and I think I know which one and everything now I just need to go up to school and I should get it soon... probably anyway... unless my dad wants to come up and get it with me. Eh well I just wanted to write a short note today cuz I should get to sleep early.

Ok so I took a break

Alright so for the past few days I didn't post anything but I have a good reason... I was shopping a lot... I went to King of Prussia on Friday with Anna and the yesterday I went to 3 malls with my parents. I got a really cute sailor dress but I need to get a navy blue cami and leggings to wear with it cuz it's kinda low and short.... haha. Um so I have a couple things to get out there:

1) Steff and Brian are fighting and it's not really any of my business but I would like to know why cuz I know sometimes Steff can overreact to stuff and I'd like to help them out. I either think that when Brian was drunk he cheated or used drugs. The drugs thing I think is forgivable as long as he didn't become addicted or anything but the cheating thing is definately not so easy to forgive. I know Steff has strong feelings on drugs and all but I mean if that was what Brian did wrong I think I could help Steff reason it out. Idk.... I just don't like seeing friends fight and not know exactly why they are fighting and all....

2) My parents don't really like Steve and that's for a couple reasons. I think my mom is jealous of him, my dad doesn't ever want me to grow up, and my mom told me this morning that when Steve came to visit he didn't really "reach out" to my parents so they feel like he's an outsider or something? I really don't know... are people supposed to get all buddy buddy with their s.o.'s parents? I don't think I tried to do that with Steve's parents... I was nervous about making a good impression but I didn't try to like strike up conversations with them and go buy them flowers or anything. I told Steve that I felt like I should dress up and be all nice to them but he was like "no just be yourself!" but I guess my parents found that to be rude? They think that because he didn't try to communicate with them and stuff that he doesn't really care about me or something? I don't understand I think my parents just have really old values and such like for example why I have a curfew and why I can't sleep in the same room as my s.o. but of course I have cuz I didn't always tell my parents that my s.o. was my s.o. but also I think it's totally unfair that I can sleep in the same room as my female guests and not my male ones. Sometimes I just wanna tell my parents that but then my dad would be all like "oh well you're not gonna go and have sex with your female guests" and I'd be like "dammit yes I will!" ... but that would be bad... I wish they'd just trust me. I mean I can't exactly say I've never had sex in my house... (ONLY ONCE) but... I mean I wish I could say that but... eh my stupid rebellious part. *sigh* I just wanna be able to have a normal nowadays relationship where the parents are all like oh yea your boyfriend can stay over it's ok you guys just go watch movies in your room. My parents won't even let me bring my boyfriend into my room!!!!!! They think every one of my friends or lovers will go into their room and steal stuff. It's ridiculous. I hate it all they are so strict on my friends when I know my friends better than they do and I know who I can trust and who I wouldn't want to.

Fhew... ok. Had to get that out. *sigh* I'm freaking almost as old as my mom was when she got married!! Why won't they just let me be myself I can take care of myself they just say "Oh we don't want you to get hurt" but hey I already lived thru having my heart ripped out and shit upon. I didn't die then. I mean it was hard to deal with by myself and I almost went and talked to my mom about it a few times but I didn't and I still made it. I won't screw up like my parents did and drop out. Yea I'm kinda sad the person I'm dating dropped out of school but it doesn't mean I will. God. Everyone thinks I'm so little and can't take care of myself. I can. I really don't need protection. I've lived through a lot. Not as much as some people for sure but I'm not a person who's so fragile that she'll die if she doesn't have support at all the turns in her life. I deal with inner conflicts I don't discuss and I'm still ok. I'm not fucked up like some people and have to cut or anything. Well anyway... I guess I'll go um... be bored some more.

Berries and Creme

Haha whenever I see that commercial I think of Steve because he loves that one actor guy. Oh such a weird commercial though... but I totally love it when Steve does the little song and faces hahahaha oh I miss him muchly... *tears* ah well I mean I told my parents I wouldn't take the car out of town that much during the summer but I have a feeling that I'm gonna end up seeing him every weekend or like every other weekend or so. I really shouldn't hahah but I mean when I figure out my courseload I'll probably find out that on the weekends I'll have a ton of free time. Maybe... that is.... but um I don't care hahah if I do well in classes and stuff I think driving a few hours to go chill for the weekend with my honey beer is ok. Oh and I can't wait until next Sunday Adult Swim's Family Guy....

But anyway, I took a ton of Steve's clothes home with me without even realizing it because they were in my hamper. I guess it doesn't really matter but I was very confused as to who's boxers some of them where I didn't know for sure for a minute. Em... I also have a problem with my sleeping and I don't know what to do for summer classes because the Latin starts at 8am so I was thinking about making them a night class by going to sleep in the afternoon and waking up around midnite and then just studying all night... but I just realized that if I went to visit Steve he wouldn't be like that because he works in the morning at 7am... maybe I should just try to wake up early. Hum... and also I was thinking if I do it the other way I would not be able to do the things I sometimes do to break the boringness of staying at home. I doubt my parents would remove my curfiew and that's the only reason I'd wanna live at night anyway. I find the people that are around at night super interesting and you actually get to talk to them because people aren't rushing around to get to work and such. I like that.

Watching NANA 44

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES I knew Ren was going to say that!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

*EXPLOSION*

Strange Love

I just realized something really strange... there's usually at least one couple within our town group and now I don't think there's any of our friends that are dating any of our other friends like we usually have. This is really really really strange. Just thought I'd make a note of it.

College and online journals

Well, quite honestly, I never thought anyone I knew in college would ever read any of my blogs or xangas or anything. Myspace I wrote and made avaliable on my facebook and all.... other than that I just wanted to keep these things to my high school sorta things. I just kinda splurt stuff out on them anyway, and when Steve found my xanga and read some posts about when I was just starting to date him and I kept calling him a skater boy and I said some mean stuff about Steff's roommate I realized "AAhh I sounded so shallow!! I hope Steve doesn't think I'm really that way......." So then that's why I stopped posting on there and kinda everywhere for a while... So I think I'll start up on here again but I'm gonna not just type my messed up train of thought cuz then I end up sounding horrible.

Also I think I was realizing something today, that one of the few ways my dad and I can connect is in making fun of other people... and that's really not cool at all... I mean we were at a Panera the other day and this kid walked in with a mullet and on one side it was shaved in a few lines like a cougar claw got him there or something but the other side didn't have that at all.... and it was horrible and I really don't know why that kid just didn't get it fixed but I couldn't stop laughing at him with my dad... *sigh* I mean I know it wasn't nice.... ugh but idk... So eh... Oh and also my parents made it now so that if they make fun of each other and I catch them doing that... I get $5 from whoever made fun of the other. I've caught my dad making fun of my mom but he hasn't owned up and given me any money *sigh*

In other news, my dad offered to get me a laptop but I really want a Mac and those are expensive... Idk maybe people... I don't think anyone reads this right now but... maybe people with those kinds of computers could tell me what's best or something. Macs all seem to be kinda expensive and I wanna keep my desktop too cuz it is my TV so eh idk... Alright well I guess I'll stop this post now. Maybe I'll end up telling people I'm gonna use this blog now so people will know to read it... but not yet lol.

Some random posts!

You Should Drive a Blue Car

You're the type of driver who isn't hung up on the what car you drive. You don't need a flashy car to show off your wealth or style. Instead, you go for value and reliability. You're quite practical. You're a great driver, but you don't show off. Part of your skill is not standing out on the road.

What Color Car Should You Drive?

Haha I love how the pic of the car is my mom's car.......

Your Life is Rated R

Your life is definitely adults only. While children accompanied by parents are welcome, they'll probably be scarred for life.

What is Your Life Rated?





Eh but I was thinking I suppose I'll start posting on here more because I will be at school studying most of the summer and I'll probably be bored/lonely so hey this will be a good outlet for all that stuff.

Posting This in TWO Places...

Cuz I like to do what Jo does.